Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The month went by much too fast. Every day was a different adventure. They sailed the lake, walked the trails in the State Parks, dined at restaurants and picnicked by the stream. They hugged, held hands, made love at every opportunity. They laughed and, at times, they cried.

Throughout all this, they maintained free space, time away from each other. They kept to their scheduled calls but now there were no set limits. Forty minutes gave way to hours. Still, she received his suggestions, and she followed them through.

His house was, as he had said, not such a big deal. Or, she was growing used to it. The wonderful parts of it were external: the view, the orchards, the trails and the stream – and the bedroom, a lush patch of lea upon which a multi-colored blanket was set by them, for them. It was on this bed nestled in the woods that they spoke of his returning to work.

“You’re deep in thought,” she said. “Our time together is coming to an end?”

Henry sat quietly for a moment, his arms wrapped over his knees. “Yes, it is.” Next Tuesday I’m off to Thailand, then on to Australia and China.”

“Sounds like quite an adventure.” Alison moved closer, her left arm behind him supporting her weight, her body touching his and her left cheek on his shoulder. Without warning, she pulled back slightly and pushed him gently on to his back so she could see his face fully.

“It is. Or, it was, until you. I no longer feel the pull to step into one more plane or to hand my bags to another porter.”

“Yes, but your friends need to see you. And there are problems that need solutions. That’s what you do, is it not?”

She watch his face closely, expecting a smile. It did not come.

Instead his face grew serious. He sat up, his face inches from hers. “It is what I do, and I love it. But I love you, too, and I’m torn.”

Alison’s arms slowly enveloped him and her body pushed him to the ground, Her lips met his and she pressed them forcefully against them. His lips yielded and accepted hers, followed by their tongues filling their mouths. Slowly she raised herself to sit, her left hand holding him down.

“These days have been the most wonderful times in my memory. I wish they wouldn’t end, either, but they are. It doesn’t mean we are ending. It’s three weeks, after all. And we have our phone calls, and I have my personal growth to attend to.”

With the softest of touches, she pulled on his belt, releasing its hold. She unzipped his fly and pulled his shirt from under the slacks. Then she began to unbutton his shirt slowly from the bottom.

“When we first met, I was in search of my new self and my new life. I still am, and you are still my guide.”

His chest exposed, Alison massaged his breast, her fingers toying with the hair. His nipples hardening at her touch.

“All my married life, I had a fixed identity, and I loved it. I was the perfect wife, supporter, mother, volunteer, the list goes on. Then it all went away.

Her hands traced the sides of his body, moving slowly toward his pants.

“Now I am becoming, what exactly I don’t know. But I love whatever it is, and I have to continue, so I can discover it. I know I don’t want to be a housewife, I’m beyond being a mother, and I no longer want to be a secretary.”

“I am a woman. I am a sexual animal thanks to you. I have a mind that I want to exercise, and I want to achieve. All this I know. I also know that I want you. And that means accepting you as you are. And you, me.”

He lay silent as she spoke and responded to her touch. He lifted his buttocks to ease her removal of his slacks, and felt himself growing harder as her fingers caressed his testes and slowly closed around his shaft. Her head moved gracefully and disappeared below his sight as her mouth swallowed him deep within, her falling hair tickling his abs.

He moaned happily as his hand caressed the back of her head. He felt her fingers gently skimming his sac, his testicles growing with her touch,

“Now!, he said, alerting her to the fluids about to explode. “That’s it! Oooh” he screamed as they rushed into her mouth. His body lurched in response, up, down, then up again. Finally his back came to rest on the blanket. Her mouth released him slowly inch by inch.
She felt the hot liquid flow into her, down her throat, enjoying the sensation to the fullest. She then leaned forward and laid with him, her head on his chest, her hand caressing his cheek.

“Life is good,” she said, her head to his chest. “It will be good for us.” She listened to his heart beating as they napped a while under the sun.

When they awoke, the sun had moved toward the horizon. Henry was quiet as he looked around for his clothes. Gathering them into a pile he set them aside and moved toward Alison, who sat quietly in meditation facing the sun, her back to him. His arms reached out to her shoulders, pulling her gently to the ground. She gracefully acceded, smiling up into his eyes.
“You’re right,” he said in a low voice. Life is good, and so are we. You are still a student and I am still your coach. But now I think we are more.”

His lips found hers then, her neck. “Boy, that’s an awkward position,” he said laughing, and he moved to lay at her side. “While you were growing, so was I. My growth was a direct result of our time together.”

Henry moved to look into her eyes, his hand finding hers and placing it on his heart. “I know all about problems, process problems, financial problems, social problems. In the process of being a solver of problems, I inadvertently, or maybe intentionally ignored a problem of my own, loneliness.”

He raised himself to face her, supporting himself on his elbow. Instinctively, Alison lifted her hand to caress his face. He kissed the soft part of her palm.

“We’ll play this by ear, one day at a time -- for now. There is a harmony to all this and a pattern. Let’s see if we can make this last.”

As their lips met and yielded to each other, Henry’s hand cupped her breast and squeezed it gently. He smiled as he manipulated the buttons on her blouse. “ What you did for me, I want to do for you.” Alison’s face lit up, a broad smile filled her as she eagerly worked to release herself from her clothing.

Tuesday was spent largely in his bed, sharing themselves to their limits in the knowledge that a barren time laid ahead. After a leisurely lunch, Henry moved his bags to the front porch.

“That’s not much luggage for three weeks. Do you always take a limo to the airport?”

“Yes. It’s foolish to leave a car at the airport. I don’t carry many bags because I have clothes in every city. I never know for sure when I’m coming back. In the past, if I got an emergency call form a client, I changed my plans. If I discovered some off the wall adventure, I had the option of taking a side trip instead of coming here.
“I’ve only been back three times since we first began our calls together. Some times I stayed a week or so where I was because I didn’t want to spend another two days in airports only to leave again in a week.”

A rush of sadness filled her. She could understand the difficulty his lifestyle put on him. Hotel to hotel, airline to airline. The fatigue. She realized their time together was, for him, a respite. Henry immediately understood the look on her face and moved to assuage her doubts.

“That was before I met you, before I found myself eager to get home to see you and to see if there was something there – or if it was just in my mind. I am already planning my trip home. You will be with me throughout. Please, don’t get nervous and fearful .” His voice was almost pleading.
The sound of tires on crushed stone announced the limo’s arrival. Henry took Alison into his arms. “You can stay here if you’d like.”

“No, I think it’s best if I go to my place.”

“I understand. But here’s a key if you need it.”

“I might like to use the library,” she said softly.

She moved into his arms and held him tightly to her.

Alison felt awkward as she wave good-bye from his front porch. This was not her house, and maybe he wasn’t her man. She just hoped their calls would keep coming. Losing him was less important than losing her mentor.

Wednesday morning brought reality home. She awoke without him by her side and she missed him. She showered alone but her memories filled with time they spent together under the spout. Breakfast for one added to the angst. I am a woman, she told herself, and she moved ahead resolute.

She immersed herself in her studies. After lunch, she took a ride to clear her head, then returned home to listen to CDs. Thursday was their scheduled call. She wanted to be prepared.

Henry called as she was sitting down to supper. Seeing his name on the screen, her heart rate doubled and a smile filled her top to bottom.

“Hi, there!, she said energetically. How are you?”

“I’m fine, thanks, and I miss you. I hope you feel the same.

“I do, and I am back on my schedule to fill the time until you return. Are we still on for our ‘regular’ call tomorrow?”

“Of course, our regular call is on my calendar. This, I hope will become a regular call as well.”

“I’d like that.”

“So, where are you?”

“I’m in my hotel in Bangkok. Looks like our meetings will be held here instead of the usual place. There’s a strike going on across the city and my clients feel it’s better all around if I stay here and they take the drive.”

“Are you in danger?,” she asked, suddenly fearful for him.
“No, I don’t think so. This kind of turmoil goes on here all the time, with brief periods of calm. If things get out of hand, they send in the troops.”

Alison clutched the phone, her knuckles turning white.

“The troops?”

“Darling, youre well read. Surely you’ve known that these things happen in Thailand – and China, and …”

“Yes, of course, but I never had someone I love in the middle of it, and so visibly not a native. Henry, I am afraid for you.”

“I love that you’re afraid for me, and even more that you said you love me. But I’ll be fine. Things will be fine.”

The sound of the bomb exploding in the lobby caught her by surprise. The impact sent Henry to the floor. Still gripping the phone, he heard her voice.

“Henry, what was that noise! Are you alright?

“Everything’s fine here, darling. Just some partiers. Look, I have to go. My clients are here. I love you. I’ll call you.. “

The line gong quiet was disconcerting. Was it a bad connection, or was something wrong? Alison went to the computer to access CNN and the BBC. When nothing popped up, she returned to her supper, starting with a large sip of wine. Hours would pass before she would read of the bombing, and fear would overtake her.

She heard the reports of the bombing first on cable news. A suicide bomber had entered the lobby of a hotel in downtown Bangkok frequented mostly by foreign business travelers and representatives of foreign governments. Damage was limited to the lobby area but it was unsure how severely the infrastructure had been affected, Danger of a collapse was not ruled out and guests were being shuttled to other hotels. Aside from the bomber, whose body parts were strewn throughout, estimates were that 20 or more people were dead or injured, some of them foreigners. No names were given.

Try as she might, Alison was unable to reach Henry’s phone. She had no other way to contact him and she wasn’t even sure if he was staying at that hotel. Her mind raced from scenario to scenario, some of them horrific, others much more acceptable. Perhaps that wasn’t his hotel. Maybe he was in meetings as planned. There was no way to know. She found her way into a lotus position and focused on her breathing.

Her phone rang just after 10;00 p.m. Her heart raced as she heard his voice.

“Hi Alison. I called to let you know everything’s all right before you head off to bed.”
“What time is it there?

“It’s just after 2:00 p.m. here. My clients and I are headed out for lunch.”

“Where are you staying? Are you at the hotel that was bombed? Was that the explosion I heard?”

“ I was at the hotel, yes. And that was the explosion you heard. Some people were killed and others were injured. I am all right. My client is putting me up at his house for a few days. It’s in a a secure area.”

“And the hotel was not in a secure area?”

“Well, we thought it was. Others thought ‘not so much.’”

“But you’re safe now. And you’ll stay that way?”

“Absolutely. Look, there’s more to tell you about this part of the world but it can’t be done over the phone. I’ll tell you everything when we’re together. I promise. Just sleep tight. We have a call for tomorrow afternoon, right?”

“That’s right. I’ll await your call.

“I love you.”

Her fears rose as she hung up the phone. Why? She asked herself. He’s OK, in one piece, with people who should know. Still, she returned to the lotus position before heading to sleep.

Henry returned to his clients, smiling confidently. A server approached their table with ice water and lemon and their talks resumed after a toast.

Lengthy meetings are beneficial after a bombing. Focusing on external problems keeps a body from dwelling on the realities of possible death just a few stories and a lobby away. Discussing the intricate details of a major plant expansion is just what’s needed for times like this. The focus is on construction, not destruction, about improvements and the growth of a nation. It’s the hours after those meetings that are stressful.

In the quiet solitude, whether in one’s room or sitting by the pool, that other, conflicting issues come to the fore. Displacing a few thousand people from their shanty homes to make way for a plant that will employ thousands of people at barely subsistence wages was not on the agenda. Nor would it be. Neither would the attempted subjugation of minorities, or the lack of adequate clean water. Henry always thrilled at the challenges posed by life’s problems but he oftentimes had no control over which problems he would be invited to resolve. In Thailand, it was manufacturing. In Haiti, it was housing and infrastructure. He preferred Haiti but Thailand paid much better.
Now, in addition to his normal litany of activities, he added his relationship with Alison. In many ways, the parallels were obvious. Thailand was business. She was Haiti: beautiful, filled with potential, soul inspiring. He preferred her.

He thought back in depth to their initial conversations. Recently divorced, she was overflowing with optimism balanced with pragmatism. Her résumé was obsolete in today’s economy. A thirty year old degree in home economics, decades out of the workforce, at a time when younger, better educated competition stood in line for any job they could get. But what she lacked, she more than made up for in intelligence, organization, commitment, and fire in the belly.

His initial assignment had long since been fulfilled. In truth, she didn’t need him any more. She had proven she could meet any challenge and master any field. All she needed was a chance. He had thought to connect her with clients in the states who would love to have her. But, he was unsure how they would feel about her as a consultant. More was necessary for that to happen. So he re-envisioned his assignment and proceeded accordingly.

Seeing her as a friend, a lover, perhaps a mate took some time. He had coached many people, men and women, and was able to maintain clearly defined boundaries. Some, like Helen, proved they weren’t a match, even for themselves. In that regard he was happy to help them discover their personal truths and send them along. Alison defied definition. Her energy and commitment struck him with awe. His assignments, given as suggestions, were fulfilled beyond any expectations and the questions she asked afterwards went right to the core of the issues she was studying. By rights, she was him, missing only a degree or two and some contacts. Professionally, he could not have been more pleased.

Personally, however, was a different story. He found himself learning more about himself and his deficiencies than he had planned. He also discovered that he was inept at deeply personal relationships where one has to accept being vulnerable and expose himself to being hurt. He was not unaware that he simply spent too much of his time in his head to leave room for sharing with others. Oftentimes he told himself, “I am not from here” as a self defense mechanism.

Alison changed all that. She captivated him with her ‘professional side’ and awed him with her abilities in interpersonal communication, in expressing empathy, in bringing people out of themselves, himself included. The biggest challenge of his life began when he committed to open himself up to her, and risk both rejection and the loss of a valued student. After their month together, he was confident that he could grow even more with her guidance. Sitting alone by the pool, a smile to filled his soul, and he thrilled that he had taken the chance.